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Rosalind Smith-Nazilli, 13 Jul '12

SLAUGHTER

They buried the babies first. As each small body was lowered into the ground, they wept.

The mission to evacuate women and children had failed. Their unit had arrived too late and the slaying was over.

Not a living soul remained. Every woman and every child had been a victim of this atrocity.

The men had long gone. Taking what was of use to them, they had fled into the night, leaving only the stench of death behind and the realisation for the soldiers of the horror they had failed to prevent.

As they gripped the ruby encrusted handles of the blades, signs of such opulence, and pulled them from the bodies of the slaughtered innocents, each of them silently wondered to himself what kind of men could murder their own wives and children.

Comments · 13

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  • Rosalind Smith-Nazilli said...

    My first contribution is from my first collection of Flash Fiction.

    I am hoping to pop in here at least twice a week with something written especially for here.

    Am away to read other contributions.

    • Posted 10 years ago
  • Jamie Thomas said...

    Wow, this is so powerful! You managed to convey the atrocity in a subtle way, but it was still horrific and intriguing and gripping, I really enjoyed reading it. It is things like this that I wish I could read more of. I look forward to reading your other stuff :)

    • Posted 10 years ago
  • Anthony Blackshaw said...

    Hey @Rosalind Smith-Nazilli welcome to Burrst. I'm awestruck by how you managed to convey so much in so few words, great debut.

    • Posted 10 years ago
  • Jessica Cambrook said...

    I agree, you've told a story with emotion, intrigue and mystery in barely any words. Really well done :D

    • Posted 10 years ago
  • Deb Howell said...

    What an opening line! (Interestingly, I managed to completely miss the title in caps on the home page ... must be something in the font, or something ...? Anyway, "They buried the babies first" certainly caught my attention. And then that last line ... Wow. Very well done.

    • Posted 10 years ago
  • Rosalind Smith-Nazilli said...

    Thank you Jessica, Deb and Liam for your kind comments..

    • Posted 10 years ago
  • Jessica Sepple said...

    The first sentence is so gripping! Such a dark image and it holds so much implication! It's amazing that you could say so much in five words. I wasn't expecting that ending. It was a fantastic twist!

    • Posted 10 years ago
  • Rosalind Smith-Nazilli said...

    Thanks Jessica..x

    • Posted 10 years ago
  • Shirley Golden said...

    Hi Rosalind, just wanted to say I thought this piece was very powerful and the closing line is brilliant. I'll look forward to reading more of your bursts!

    • Posted 10 years ago
  • Rosalind Smith-Nazilli said...

    Thanks Shirley.. Much appreciated..x

    • Posted 10 years ago